Disillusion

*Disclaimer* I want it to be known that I am not speaking of Dog4Deeds. They are in desperate need for a specially trained dog and they do need the extra help. I just wanted to make that clear and if you can spare a couple bucks, his link is on my list of links, please donate to the cause.

Not long after Nicky was diagnosed, it was decided that I enroll him in Early Childhood Development. I wasn't getting much on the lines of child support, neither of us were on disability yet. He had no nice clothes for attending school. As humiliating as it was, I did ask online folk for help in the sense that did they have clothes in good shape that their sons had outgrown. It was hard to do. It was humiliating, but Nicky needed it. People were very generous, they sent Nicky clothing, and some actually sent money and gift cards, and not a single cent was spent on me because I would have felt like the sleaziest human being on earth if I had.

I'm not pointing fingers, if you are offended, then you must be guilty of it.

I'm naive at times, I thought people were all for doing the best for their kids like me, but I was wrong, I saw a darker side. There are parents out there who exploit their children and their autism for their own gain.

Nicky gets respite, that is covered by his Medical Insurance. The other company we went through, took him to places like Valley Fair and all sorts of trips, but I could not go along, it was just for Nicky. That's all that mattered to me. But all that fun didn't matter much when those workers treated him like garbage.

People get donations for their kids. Computers. I bought mine. They get all sorts of free things, they even get free trips for the whole family! Some of what gets donated to their kids, they end up using themselves and it horrifies me. I'd like to get Nicky to a Comic Con, but there is no way in hell I would ask anyone for the money to get there.

Somethings online, yes, are for my pleasure, but asking for special tweets, etc. it's all for Nicky. If someone wants to do something special for Nicky, that's great. We don't have a lot of family, he's had it rough, but never would I use Nicky for my own personal gain. And I know there are several others out there who are like me, we do what we do for the good of our kids. I will ask someone to send Nicky a message, a kind word, but I will never ask for anything else. If someone wishes to gift him with something, awesome, but I'd never screw another person around.